Hollywood Haikus

How many of you
Watched this rubbish just to see
Halle Berry's tits?

We have lost our car.
Our girlfriends are not happy.
What happened last night?

Forget Spinal Tap
The life of Anton Newcombe
Could be none more black.

No "Goldenballs" here -
But Steel Leg and Iron Head
Still show their mettle.

Spanish man with 'tache
Helps Welsh Mexican family -
He will play a cat.

Ralph Fiennes has no nose.
How does he smell? Perhaps he
uses some magic.

My dog's got no nose.
How does he smell? Of dead flesh.
He's a zombie dog.

Two boys, a lady,
A bizarre love triangle,
And your mother too.

The machines attack
Lots of rubbish stuff happens
Neo saves the day

Pompous verbiage
Random action sequences
And that's the best bits.